


the longest distance

by Marked_by_moonlight



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Autistic Spencer Reid, Bisexual Spencer Reid, Coffee, Comfort Sex, F/M, Gen, Healthy Relationships, Hurt/Comfort, Miscarriage, Non-Graphic Smut, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory Negotiations, Safe Sane and Consensual, Spoilers, Team as Family, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:41:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22414915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marked_by_moonlight/pseuds/Marked_by_moonlight
Summary: Jennifer Jareau wakes up in 2005, and then proceeds to throw up on the floor.
Relationships: Jennifer "JJ" Jareau & Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau/William LaMontagne Jr., William LaMontagne Jr./Spencer Reid
Comments: 19
Kudos: 144





	1. by halves

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own Criminal Minds! Don’t sue me!
> 
> I’ve only watched up to part of season 10, but past Nelson’s Sparrow. That gave me the motivation to write this fic.
> 
> Comments are appreciated, they help me write faster.

“Time is the longest distance between two places.” Tennessee Williams, The Glass Menagerie 

—————————-

JJ wakes up to her alarm blaring loudly in her ears. She reaches blindly for the smooth surface of her phone, but feels only the clunky plastic of an alarm clock. Her eyes blink open and she sits up slowly, unaware of where she is.

Her sheets are a dark purple, and the bed is a small, cramped twin. She isn’t in her home. Will is nowhere to be seen. Henry and Michael aren’t here either, wherever here is. She turns off the alarm and is greeted with blessed silence. She doesn’t have a weapon, and is in unfamiliar surroundings.

Her fingers tap against bare thighs, and it registers in her brain that she is in her pajamas. Soft short shorts and a band t shirt from college, that she swore she threw out before she moved in with Will.

The situation is confusing, even more so is the ancient blackberry on the nightstand. She picks it up and flips it open to see a message from Gideon.

Have fun with Spencer today, kiddo!

She can’t breathe. This isn’t possible. Gideon’s been dead for years now. Her eyes flick up to the date and all of her remaining air leaves her lungs. Bile rises in her throat and she falls heavily to the floor. Vomit splatters onto the floor and tears fall rapidly down her face.

It cannot be two thousand and five, it can’t be. Her hair falls in golden strands down her face. She clutches desperately at the hardwood floor, as though it will somehow ground her. Spittle flies out between her teeth and dribbles down her chin. A cry tears itself from her throat and she fights back the memories of a life she has not yet lived.

She remains on the floor for god knows how long, until her phone chimes. She reaches for it and flips it open. The screen blares to life and in tiny print is a message from Spencer. It is only two words, but she feels her breath hitch. 

Tivon Askari

The phantom pain blooms in her abdomen, and she absentmindedly moves the arm supporting her weight to curl around her flat stomach. Her thumb hovers over the green call button, before pressing it. The phone gives two short rings, and then Spencer’s voice is filling her apartment.

“JJ, yesterday I would have told you that time travel is a scientific impossibly. But I think that might be false, either we have travelled through time, or our subconscious minds are having important memories come to the surface and-“ 

She cuts him off with a fond, “Spence.”, and settles back onto her bare feet. A warm smile plays at her lips. 

“Do you want to go get coffee?” She asks. “I need something to steady my nerves.”

As soon as the sentence registers, she hears his voice come across the tiny speaker.

“Studies have shown that in the short term, coffee can help lower anxiety, produce dopamine, and lead to a decreased risk of dementia.”

She fails to stifle a snort, and feels her eyes crinkle with joy at the familiar rambling. 

“So is that a yes, Dr. Spencer Reid?” Asks JJ.

He laughs in response, before replying.

“Yes, Jennifer Jareau. I will gladly go get coffee with you in the year two thousand and five Anno Domini.”

She laughs and says goodbye, knowing he’ll text her the address. Her hand reaches up to card through her hair, and snags on a tangle. She stands on unsteady feet and goes to shower.

—————————

“There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.” Jane Austen, Northhanger Abbey


	2. something of a miracle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ and Spencer meet for coffee, then have sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own Criminal Minds

“It doesn’t matter where you’re from - or how you feel…. There’s always peace in a strong cup of coffee.” Gabriel Bá, Daytripper

——————

He is at the coffee shop an hour early, the scent of freshly brewed coffee filling his nose. His closet was dreadfully dull, but he managed to scrounge up something that suited him. 

A blue knit wool sweater with a white t shirt underneath and khaki pants, his familiar leather satchel slung around his shoulder. The beaten leather couch opposite the barista counter is empty, so he settles down and waits for JJ.

The fingers of his right hand tap restlessly against his knee, as his eyes take in the minute details of the coffee shop. The trees have yet to change color, and the weather is still average for the area. The beginning of August brings cool temperatures to Virginia, lessening the pressing heat of July. Hurricane season has just begun and Katrina is brewing in the Gulf. 

He tears his eyes away from counting the number of nicks and scratches in the side table when he hears the small silver doorbell chime. JJ enters the coffee shop, and takes his breath away. She is in jeans and a denim colored flannel, to his shock she is wearing blue converse. He stands to greet her and she floats over to him.

He wraps her up in a hug, lifting her feet off the ground. She mumbles a greeting into his chest, her arms braced around his shoulders. His nose twitches at the scent of her shampoo. After a moment, he steps back and rakes his eyes over her form to make sure she’s real.

Her hand finds his and gives it a squeeze. His other hand reaches up to brush her hair back before he pauses and asks if it’s alright. JJ just nods and leans into his touch like a man starving. He watches as her eyelids flutter closed, taking pleasure from his touch. 

He recalls everything he has ever read about time travel, and nothing says that what they are both experiencing is real. It is though, because he can feel her. She is as real as the room around him, and he to her. They have been given a second chance, to love, to live, to be happy.

The pad of his thumb brushes lightly over her cheekbone, and then he disentangles himself from her.

“I’m gonna go get coffee, JJ. What do you want?” Says Spencer, softly.

She lets out a long sigh and replies, “Just black coffee will be fine Spence. Thank you.”

As he turns towards the counter, he sees JJ curl up on the couch, her legs tucked underneath her. There is hardly anyone in the shop with them, so their coffee order gets filled quickly. The paper is warm against his hands, the heat radiating outward, steam curling upward towards his nose.

He sits their coffee on the side table, and settles down on the couch. JJ has her left arm on the back of the sofa, her chin propped up in her hand. She’s grinning at him, her eyes bright.

He smiles back at her and lifts his arm in silent invitation. JJ scoots forward and settles against his side, her head resting on his chest. He presses a featherlight kiss to the top of her head and murmurs soft nothings in her ear.

Eventually, she stirs and asks for coffee. He reaches over and hands her the cup, and is then rendered speechless. JJ practically climbs in his lap, before unfurling her legs and stretching them out along the length of the couch.

“Is this okay, Spence?” Says JJ.

He just hums in agreement and takes a sip of his coffee. They lay there on the couch for hours, until finally he rouses JJ from her slumber. It’s past sunset, the streetlights causing the dark pavement to glow orange outside. The coffee shop is closing soon, so they need to leave.

The remainder of their coffee has grown cold and is now nothing but bitter, black liquid. He pitches them in the trash on the way out, JJ following close behind. He sees the way she nearly stumbles, still half asleep.

“JJ, you can’t drive in this condition. Let me take you home.” Says Spencer.

She just nods and reaches for him, curling a slender arm about his waist. He can barely hear her over the suddenly loud din of the city.

“I didn’t drive anyway, Spence. Thank you though.”

“We can get a cab.”

Eventually he hails a cab and the drive is summarily shorter than he expects. The interior smells like stale cigarettes and sweat. JJ is pressed against him, curled tight in the safety of his embrace and he marvels at the mysteries of the universe. What did he do to deserve such a wonderful woman in his life? 

Jennifer is strong, an exceptionally lovely woman and all he can feel is grateful that she is here with him.

He helps her to her apartment, and when she asks him inside, he cannot say no. The space is small, a one bedroom with a living space and a small kitchenette, but it is cozy. 

JJ lets out a long sigh and runs her fingers through her hair. She paces around the floor restlessly, like a caged animal, and all he can do is watch her in concern. She finally turns to him, tears filling her eyes.

“Spencer, I miss them so much I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to move on. I just-“ She cuts herself off in the middle of the sentence, before turning away from him.

He places a gentle hand on her shoulder, his thumb rubbing smooth circles in an attempt to provide comfort. 

“Whatever you need Jennifer, I’m here.”

He feels her jolt at the use of her first name, before she turns to him. Tears are falling softly down her face and she swallows thickly before speaking.

“I want to feel better, Spence. Please, I just- I want to feel good.” 

His eyes close as he realizes what it is she’s asking him to do. It’s a bandaid for a knife wound, it likely won’t help, but damn it if he isn’t willing to give her everything she wants.

“JJ, before we do this, I have to know that you won’t just use me and then leave me be.” He whispers.

He sees her gasp at the thought, the inhale of breath making her breasts heave. The assurances spill forth from her lips, before she pauses and says something that has true meaning for the both of them.

“I meant it, Spence. I’ve always loved you, and I want you, not just for right now, for the rest of our lives.”

He does not mean this to be cruel, but he has to be sure. His eyebrows flick upwards before he says, “And what about Will?”

“Spence, some part of me will grieve what I had with Will and my boys, but what are the chances that things even happen the same way again?” Says Jennifer, “It wouldn’t be the same.”

His eyes are sincere as he reaches down to cup her face. 

“If you’re absolutely sure, JJ, then yes. I’ll help you take the pain away and start over.”

She surges up to kiss him, and it is everything that he ever dreamed it would be. Her hands tangle in his hair, and she wraps her legs around his waist, entangling herself into him.

One of his hands is splayed along the upper part of her back, while the other supports her weight underneath her butt. He walks her gingerly to the small twin bed in the other room, and settles her down onto the duvet.

A bright pink blush spreads from her cheekbones down below the collar of her shirt.

“Um, there are condoms in the first drawer of the nightstand.”

He just nods and begins to undress. He will give her every pleasure he can think of, so long as she wishes him to, for the rest of time.

——————

“To have her here in bed with me, breathing on me, her hair in my mouth— I count that as something of a miracle.” Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer


	3. love and trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone unexpected shows up at JJ’s door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own Criminal Minds

“Clouds, leaves, soil, and wind all offer themselves as signals of changes in the weather. However, not all storms of life can be predicted.” David Petersen

————-

She is warm, tucked into the long heat of Spencer’s body. Their bodies are pale in the dove grey light of dawn, half covered by the purple bed sheet. She brushes her fingertips over the crescent moon indents on Spencer’s shoulder, in awe of this wonderful man.

His face is peaceful and lax in sleep, brushed free from the worries of the world. He had been so gentle in their coupling that she felt the guilt drive itself into her heart like a wedge.

She is not using him, and yet it feels that way. She has always loved Spencer, but the ghost of what she feels for Will and her boys haunts her. 

Their legs are entwined beneath the sheets and she has trouble removing herself without waking him. Eventually, she manages to slip away on soft feet towards the bathroom.

She does her business and washes the scent of herself off her hands with foaming cherry soap. Water droplets trail along her hands and as she goes to blot them off a fierce knocking reaches her ears.

She is still naked and likely smells of sweat and sex, so her fingers deftly snag her red plaid robe hanging on the back of the bathroom door. The light has grown stronger and filters pale gold into the apartment.

She reaches the door in record time and yanks it open, her hair ending up half in her own mouth. Standing in the hallway of her apartment is Will. Her former husband is dressed in a worn brown leather jacket and a soft dark grey v neck with rough spun blue jeans.

Stubble coats his jaw, and one of his hands is rubbing his neck in a well recognized nervous tick. She stands there open mouthed staring at him before tilting forward, her eyes blurry with tears.

His arms reach out to catch her, and she lands with a soft cry against his chest. At first, all she feels is relief and then the reality of just what it is she’s done sets in. She backs away from Will sobbing, shaking like a frightened rabbit. 

Spencer emerges from the bedroom half dressed, his hair mussed from sleep. He freezes at the sight of her and Will, a soft “Oh.” slipping out from between his teeth.

She sees a muscle in her husband’s jaw twitch and his Addams apple bob and braces herself for the tirade.

But it never comes.

Her husband’s blue eyes have widened in surprise, but she sees concern and understanding written all over his face.

She watches as he glances away and swallows heavily, before locking gazes with her.

“I understand why you did what you did, Cherie. I don’t hold it against you. You didn’t do anything wrong.” He says.

She can only gape as he continues.

“If you’re both willin’ I’m alright with it bein’ the three of us. No reason we have’ta stay traditional.”

And then Spencer speaks, his mind finally caught up with the situation.

“Monogamy is quite rare in nature, and only enforced by societal expectation in humans. It is far more beneficial to evolution and humanity as a whole for our species to be polygamous.”

She knows that she is staring blankly at the wall, but she can’t get her brain to comprehend what is happening.

Will’s voice kicks her brain into gear but it still doesn’t sink in.

Spencer gently slips his hand into her right, and Will’s arm wraps itself around her waist. She is surrounded by warmth, by the men she loves with all her heart.

“All right. Let’s do this.” She says.

———————-

“You’ll need courage because polyamorous relationships can be scary. Loving other people without a script is scary. Allowing the people you love to make choices without controlling them is scary. The kind of courage we’re talking about involves being willing to let go of guarantees - and love and trust your partners anyway.” Franklin Veaux, More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory


End file.
